On Smoking...
Let me step back into the little confessional booth I’ve established here and tell you, my “priests”, about the real darkness of my soul. I have, through no fault of my own, found myself to be a member of the counter-culture. This frightens me to no end because I’ve observed that the counter-culture usually requires some sort of tattooing and/or piercing…usually in a place that hurts, or worse…oozes. I’m not into oozings of any kind…something that I hear first time parents learn to get over quickly. Well, I guess that’s another item I can add to the "Looking Forward To…" List. I'll put it right next to "worry about college fund"...
Besides a distinct aversion to getting a haircut, the one other thing I have in common with the counter-culture is that I am distinctly anti-anti-smoking. I know I just blew some of your English teacher minds with a double negative, but whose blog is this anyway? More importantly, I am probably one of a few non-smokers who actually likes second hand smoke. I’d say I was the only one, but I did meet another girl who also likes it and thus destroyed my originality. Oh well. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I saddle up next to smokers at a bar and position myself for optimal second hand smoke inhilation, it’s just that I don’t really think you’ve entered a bar unless a nice fog is hanging about. I mean, how else do you even know you’ve gone out unless you have some of the stink on you?
By the way, if you are tempted to read this post as sarcasm, don’t…I’m dead serious. Okay, maybe I’m just moderately serious, I’m certainly not going to die for this belief or anything… However, I’m totally against these measures banning smoking in cities, including the one that is likely to pass in DC. The one time I go into DC every two years is totally ruined now. I’m certainly not going to do anything rash, like become an activist or anything, but if there is a petition of some kind…preferably online so I don’t have to actually talk to anyone, I’m totally your man.
Lest you bring up my cigar smoking as some sort of proof that I am a smoker myself, I ask you to reconsider. One cigar every half-year does not make me a smoker. If you had to endure the ritual purification that I go through to be acceptable to my wife’s olfactory sensors after a cigar, you’d limit your intake too. She is totally opposed, and probably a bit ashamed of my beliefs too. Something about her parents smoking, blah, blah, blah. I usually tune out once I see her soap box coming out.
If it weren’t for that whole cancer thing, something that I do oppose, I’d take up the naughty habit myself probably. It would totally give me a legitimate reason to not do work 15 minutes out of every hour for a smoke break. Of course, I'd still have to come up with something for the other 45 minutes. And after having accompanied folks on their smoke break on a few occasions, let me tell you that you learn things on those breaks. I wouldn't know half the dirt I know in life if it wasn't for smokers. So there is something to be said for it...
Of course, if I see Kaleigh ever smoking, the cancer won’t be the thing that kills her…
Besides a distinct aversion to getting a haircut, the one other thing I have in common with the counter-culture is that I am distinctly anti-anti-smoking. I know I just blew some of your English teacher minds with a double negative, but whose blog is this anyway? More importantly, I am probably one of a few non-smokers who actually likes second hand smoke. I’d say I was the only one, but I did meet another girl who also likes it and thus destroyed my originality. Oh well. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I saddle up next to smokers at a bar and position myself for optimal second hand smoke inhilation, it’s just that I don’t really think you’ve entered a bar unless a nice fog is hanging about. I mean, how else do you even know you’ve gone out unless you have some of the stink on you?
By the way, if you are tempted to read this post as sarcasm, don’t…I’m dead serious. Okay, maybe I’m just moderately serious, I’m certainly not going to die for this belief or anything… However, I’m totally against these measures banning smoking in cities, including the one that is likely to pass in DC. The one time I go into DC every two years is totally ruined now. I’m certainly not going to do anything rash, like become an activist or anything, but if there is a petition of some kind…preferably online so I don’t have to actually talk to anyone, I’m totally your man.
Lest you bring up my cigar smoking as some sort of proof that I am a smoker myself, I ask you to reconsider. One cigar every half-year does not make me a smoker. If you had to endure the ritual purification that I go through to be acceptable to my wife’s olfactory sensors after a cigar, you’d limit your intake too. She is totally opposed, and probably a bit ashamed of my beliefs too. Something about her parents smoking, blah, blah, blah. I usually tune out once I see her soap box coming out.
If it weren’t for that whole cancer thing, something that I do oppose, I’d take up the naughty habit myself probably. It would totally give me a legitimate reason to not do work 15 minutes out of every hour for a smoke break. Of course, I'd still have to come up with something for the other 45 minutes. And after having accompanied folks on their smoke break on a few occasions, let me tell you that you learn things on those breaks. I wouldn't know half the dirt I know in life if it wasn't for smokers. So there is something to be said for it...
Of course, if I see Kaleigh ever smoking, the cancer won’t be the thing that kills her…
posted by Beeley at 2:16 PM
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