On Hopes...
Even long before Kaleigh Madison was a twinkle in our eyes, my wife and I would sometimes play the “I Hope” game. That is the one where you say “I hope our daughter(s)/son(s) have your (fill in the blank)”. This is a cute game designed to passively compliment your spouse, or to pass a gruelingly long road trip to see the in-laws…sometimes both.
This can be a dangerous game at times. One should not attempt to play if one is, say, an idiot. Take for example this completely “hypothetical” story that possibly happened to a “friend” of mine. During a televised Women’s World Cup match, my “friend” said to his then girlfriend and future wife: “If we get married and have daughters, I hope they are just like you…except athletic”. I won’t point out the mistake in that sentence, I’ll let you do a bit of your own analysis. Let's just say that there may have been tears, and my "friend" may have had to sign apologetic documentation entitled: “Further Proof That I Suck”.
Now that Kaleigh is on the way, we are no longer playing the I Hope game as amateurs. We’ve become masters at it. Police sketch artists would find it very easy to produce a drawing based on our detailed descriptions. This is no longer a passive attempt to compliment the spouse. It is business. Just the other day it was hoped that Kaleigh does not have my skin. It is true too, I’m basically a freaking lizard with scaly skin that you could make shoes from… I even shed my skin once yearly, and I’m in season right now as a matter of fact. Also, my nose is not desirable on a female. Apparently “big” doesn’t go well with any kind of prom dress. My eyes, hair and smile are a go though…so that’s something.
Personality traits are not immune to the game either. Now that we are about to be parents…which implies that we will have to do some level of parent-ing, we are hoping beyond hope that we don’t have a little hellion… In other words, we hope Kaleigh does not take after her father in her childhood years. Personally, I’d trade any amount of early childhood hardship over teenage female drama. It’s not that I dread her teenage years, it’s just that I’d rather, you know…. flee to the hills.
Regardless, I think that anticipation has fully set in at the Halls of Mental Midgetry. It won’t be long now…
This can be a dangerous game at times. One should not attempt to play if one is, say, an idiot. Take for example this completely “hypothetical” story that possibly happened to a “friend” of mine. During a televised Women’s World Cup match, my “friend” said to his then girlfriend and future wife: “If we get married and have daughters, I hope they are just like you…except athletic”. I won’t point out the mistake in that sentence, I’ll let you do a bit of your own analysis. Let's just say that there may have been tears, and my "friend" may have had to sign apologetic documentation entitled: “Further Proof That I Suck”.
Now that Kaleigh is on the way, we are no longer playing the I Hope game as amateurs. We’ve become masters at it. Police sketch artists would find it very easy to produce a drawing based on our detailed descriptions. This is no longer a passive attempt to compliment the spouse. It is business. Just the other day it was hoped that Kaleigh does not have my skin. It is true too, I’m basically a freaking lizard with scaly skin that you could make shoes from… I even shed my skin once yearly, and I’m in season right now as a matter of fact. Also, my nose is not desirable on a female. Apparently “big” doesn’t go well with any kind of prom dress. My eyes, hair and smile are a go though…so that’s something.
Personality traits are not immune to the game either. Now that we are about to be parents…which implies that we will have to do some level of parent-ing, we are hoping beyond hope that we don’t have a little hellion… In other words, we hope Kaleigh does not take after her father in her childhood years. Personally, I’d trade any amount of early childhood hardship over teenage female drama. It’s not that I dread her teenage years, it’s just that I’d rather, you know…. flee to the hills.
Regardless, I think that anticipation has fully set in at the Halls of Mental Midgetry. It won’t be long now…
posted by Beeley at 12:40 PM
4 Comments:
I have to admit that I too have played the game, and we still hope Camryn does not have my shoulders. But I have to ask, because I am not married to either of you...
How did the game play out in the feet area? I only ask because I saw the lizard reference and wondered why the obvious Hobbit reference was omitted. And while we are on the Lord of the Rings... Only one thing comes to mind when Tolkien describes certain scents in Shelob's lair. And it's not the Hobbit's feet. (Well, two things could compare to Shelob if you count Chottiner's PF's)
You bring up a good point. My Hobbit feet are well known. But I guess I generally view the hair issue has a man thing. Thus, your shoulders are not likely to plague Camryn... And if they did...Ew.
But now that I think about it, girls could definitely have hairy feet...
Thanks, a new facet to worry about.
Hair is not Kaleigh's biggest concern.
Look Hole, I don't quite catch your meaning. If you mean it is going to be a problem that she has her mother's beauty and Dad's devilish good looks, then I guess we see eye to eye.
If that is not what you meant, you are threatening to have a hobbit foot up your poop shoot.
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