On Dreams...
I’m a very vivid dreamer. It’s frankly a bit disturbing the lunacy that occurs in my head during my non-awake hours. Frankly, it’s disturbing what goes on my in my head during my waking hours too, but that is a blog for another time. I have all kinds of dreams too. Some are recurring, some are based on the movie I just watched, some involve me naked in high school, some involve me naked in college, some involve me naked…well, you get the idea. There is a lot of personal nudity in my dreams.
As disturbing as that can be, the non-naked dreams are quite interesting. The problem is that I’m not a great rememberer. I remember most of my dreams for about the time it takes me to shower in the morning (which is actually a fair bit of time, if you know me). I usually stumble into that sweet utopia of hot water with visions of my latest, and epic, insanity. What I do tend to remember is the general theme, especially if I’ve had something similar to it before. Seriously, I am one of those guys with the recurring dream of forgetting to study for a huge exam in college. I actually really like those dreams mostly for the euphoria I feel when I wake up and realize that I’m almost 10 years beyond my last incident of schooling. I think that dream is based on a real occurrence though, and not on any latent desire I have to be a good student. I did once go into a college class (that I had skipped that previous two class sessions) and have the teacher ask me if I was ready for that days test. A test that I had no knowledge of...nor had read the material for...Needless to say, it did not go well…
…but I digress…
I have always had somewhat of a measure of control in my dreams too. I guess that is why I don’t often have nightmares. Usually, I can see just where my dream is taking me and either wake myself up, or change the dream for within. I know, for example, that that door in front of me is going to have some manner of horror behind it… be it a demon, or a guy in a hockey mask (probably a Devil’s hockey mask) or a Republican who wants to have email sex with me. So I do what no one ever seems to be able to do in a horror movie…I just ignore the door. Seriously, why is that so hard?
However, natural disaster nightmares I cannot control. The two recurring dreams that I have involve tornados and tsunamies. I am personally convinced that I will die in a tornado some day. My wife as barred us from ever living in a true tornado state (Virginia has had them from time to time, but not consistently). Usually my tornado dream involves multiple manifestation of those tubes of death, and my overwhelming need to be travelling out in them at the same time. My tsumani dreams are not the kind that actually happened a couple of years ago. Mine are the massive, wave a mile high sort. Or, they involve me being at our famly beach house and 30 foot wave after 30 foot wave forming while I'm on the beach. Freaky stuff really.
On the other hand, there is my wife. She is also a vivid dreamer…and worse, a rememberer. That’s a terrible combination. It leads her to not only remember her dream, but to want to discuss it. And by discuss, I do actually mean analyze. And by analyze, I mean with me. I admit some amusement remembering and thinking about my own dreams…when I can, but to have to sit and analyze my wife’s dreams. Kill. Me. Now.
Here is a quick analysis of my wife’s dreams though. Apparently her imagination is not as active as mine, and her dreams…well…they are limited in scope and they basically suck. I have done something bad. I have left her, cheated on her (sometimes even with a family member), killed someone in her family, killed myself, killed her or shot our dog. That’s the Beeley themed dreams. The other ones are that someone in her family died, was maimed or left. I can’t described to you the number of times I’ve gotten an evil look from her upon her waking up. Or, sometimes in the middle of the night she’ll role over and hug on me…hard…like can’t breath hard. And it’s because she’s happy to see that I am alive, or haven’t left her.
Occasionally she’ll have a good dream. Usually a sex dream. I like those. I think she needs more of those. I think we need to spend a significant amount of time analyzing those instead. Maybe even recreating them.
…but I digress…
As disturbing as that can be, the non-naked dreams are quite interesting. The problem is that I’m not a great rememberer. I remember most of my dreams for about the time it takes me to shower in the morning (which is actually a fair bit of time, if you know me). I usually stumble into that sweet utopia of hot water with visions of my latest, and epic, insanity. What I do tend to remember is the general theme, especially if I’ve had something similar to it before. Seriously, I am one of those guys with the recurring dream of forgetting to study for a huge exam in college. I actually really like those dreams mostly for the euphoria I feel when I wake up and realize that I’m almost 10 years beyond my last incident of schooling. I think that dream is based on a real occurrence though, and not on any latent desire I have to be a good student. I did once go into a college class (that I had skipped that previous two class sessions) and have the teacher ask me if I was ready for that days test. A test that I had no knowledge of...nor had read the material for...Needless to say, it did not go well…
…but I digress…
I have always had somewhat of a measure of control in my dreams too. I guess that is why I don’t often have nightmares. Usually, I can see just where my dream is taking me and either wake myself up, or change the dream for within. I know, for example, that that door in front of me is going to have some manner of horror behind it… be it a demon, or a guy in a hockey mask (probably a Devil’s hockey mask) or a Republican who wants to have email sex with me. So I do what no one ever seems to be able to do in a horror movie…I just ignore the door. Seriously, why is that so hard?
However, natural disaster nightmares I cannot control. The two recurring dreams that I have involve tornados and tsunamies. I am personally convinced that I will die in a tornado some day. My wife as barred us from ever living in a true tornado state (Virginia has had them from time to time, but not consistently). Usually my tornado dream involves multiple manifestation of those tubes of death, and my overwhelming need to be travelling out in them at the same time. My tsumani dreams are not the kind that actually happened a couple of years ago. Mine are the massive, wave a mile high sort. Or, they involve me being at our famly beach house and 30 foot wave after 30 foot wave forming while I'm on the beach. Freaky stuff really.
On the other hand, there is my wife. She is also a vivid dreamer…and worse, a rememberer. That’s a terrible combination. It leads her to not only remember her dream, but to want to discuss it. And by discuss, I do actually mean analyze. And by analyze, I mean with me. I admit some amusement remembering and thinking about my own dreams…when I can, but to have to sit and analyze my wife’s dreams. Kill. Me. Now.
Here is a quick analysis of my wife’s dreams though. Apparently her imagination is not as active as mine, and her dreams…well…they are limited in scope and they basically suck. I have done something bad. I have left her, cheated on her (sometimes even with a family member), killed someone in her family, killed myself, killed her or shot our dog. That’s the Beeley themed dreams. The other ones are that someone in her family died, was maimed or left. I can’t described to you the number of times I’ve gotten an evil look from her upon her waking up. Or, sometimes in the middle of the night she’ll role over and hug on me…hard…like can’t breath hard. And it’s because she’s happy to see that I am alive, or haven’t left her.
Occasionally she’ll have a good dream. Usually a sex dream. I like those. I think she needs more of those. I think we need to spend a significant amount of time analyzing those instead. Maybe even recreating them.
…but I digress…
posted by Beeley at 10:20 AM
4 Comments:
I'm blushing!! Poor Dana. Can't we keep the blogs at a G rating? Yes, Yo Mama does read these.
Love you unconditionally anyway!!
Mom,
No.
Your son.
More importantly than Yo Mama reads these insane blogs..Yo DADDY reads them!!! Oh myyy..
So glad you're back Beeley! That was too long an absense. I was getting way too worried about myself and my mental state, but now I feel Much much better. ha.
LISTEN! We ARE related. I have terrible fears of MONSTER tidal waves (no movie so far has depicted what my mind does), covering not only the great state of SC, but Va. as well...they are endless. I will NEVER NEVER EVER hitch a ride on a cruise ship. Mr. Bud's pond is quite sufficient. Then there's the gigantic volcano that spews forth lava that covers most of the USA in about 5 minutes. That stems from your Aunt Nita's slides of Mt. Vesuvios and the people of Pompei who got parched back in the -teenth century. I saw them so much in 5th grade that I still vividly recall the stories AND pictures. (no, i don't know how to spell that name) ANd then I used to have dreams of our house in NZ getting totally blown away by bombs because WC Jr. told so many war stories..only the front bathroom with black and white tile would remain in tact! Go figure that one. ha,ha. (nothing worse than no bathroom???) so Analyze THAT. Or maybe not. ha.
Good to have you back.
Are all men alike? Joe will wake up and tell me he had a strange dream and of course I ask about it and of course he doesn't remember. But he swears it was weird or cool or whatever! I of course can usually remember all the strange little details and trace them back to the most recent Law & Order or CSI edisode I saw. Thus why I don't watch the scary movies - Joe doesn't like waking me up when I am screaming or crying in my sleep! Way too real sometimes.
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